Kenneth W Daniels
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To whom do we owe our thanks?

11/23/2011

 
As an unbeliever at this time of year, I often struggle to know how to interact with those who expect our focus to be directed heavenward during the holiday season. During this Thanksgiving week, to whom am I to be thankful? If there is no personal, benevolent being to whom we owe our gratitude, should I just treat Thanksgiving like any other day of the year and move on without a thought? That's one possibility, and I don't have anything against secularists who take this approach. For my part, however, I'd like to use this occasion to express my gratitude to people who have made my life as full as it is. If God exists, and if he is omnipotent, what virtue is there in his making creatures like us, supplying our needs and granting our desires? In other words, where is there any sweat, any effort on God's part, in the things he has done that typically elicit praise and thanksgiving? In creating us? It couldn't have been any more difficult than for us to pick up a toothpick. In giving us families, safety, health, and enjoyment? Again, a piece of cake. 

Christians do lay claim to one act of sacrifice on God's part, namely the sacrifice of his son Jesus. If the atonement was indeed necessary in order to displace God's wrath from us to his son, then this could be seen as a sacrifice worthy of our thanksgiving, a gift that (unlike creation) did require sweat. Yet Christians have been divided since the advent of Christianity as to why this sacrifice was necessary and what it actually accomplished. Outsiders like me are puzzled how God can be considered omnipotent if he was unable simply to forgive us (as he enjoins us to forgive each other) without orchestrating the murder of his innocent son.  

But I digress. We don't know whether God exists, let alone whether he's done anything that required sacrifice worthy of our thanksgiving. But people do exist, and the sacrifices made by many of them are worthy of our thanks. I am thankful for my mother and father who selflessly changed my diapers at the cost of their time and olfactory bliss. I am thankful for the financial sacrifices they made to feed, house, clothe and educate me. I am thankful that they trained me to work and to be respectful and kind. I am thankful for their patience and affection toward me, even when I was unlovable. I am thankful for my devoted wife, who has remained faithful to me and cherished me even after I abandoned the faith in God we once shared. I am thankful for all her sacrifices to make our house a home and to provide opportunities for our children to flourish. I am thankful that my three children choose to relate to wife and me the joys and struggles of their teenage existence. 

I am thankful to my childrens' teachers, who take a lower salary that what they could earn in the corporate world to educate the next generation. I'm grateful to my children's soccer coaches, who devote countless hours to improve the skills of their players while accepting little or no monetary compensation.

I am thankful for the perseverance and insight of Alexander Fleming, who discovered the miracle of penicillin, without which I would most likely not have survived my bout with double pneumonia in 2001. The same goes for Chinese Dr. Tu Youyou, who in 1972 discovered artemisin in the leaves of the annual wormwood plant, without which I might not have lived past my three infections of malaria as a missionary in Africa. I am thankful for all the scientists and inventors who, through much sweat, tears, and bursts of insight, persevered to  bequeath to the world all manner of devices and procedures to make life better: air conditioning, mass farming, refrigeration, automobiles, airplanes, computers, cell phones, microwave ovens, hot showers, pain relievers, drugs, surgery, the Internet, and much, much more.

And I am thankful for the Enlightenment founders of our great country--men like Paine, Washington, Jefferson, Franklin, and Madison, who launched a bold experiment to found a nation based not on the divine right of kings, nor on the authority of a church, but on the rights of humans to life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness. I am thankful for those--believers and unbelievers alike--who fought to extend these rights to all who live in our country--to all races, to slaves, and to women. I am thankful to those who have sacrificed life and limb to defend our freedoms over the centuries--to those who have fought against tyranny, oppression, and naked aggression. I am even thankful for those in government office who maintain the public order, who put away criminals, who uphold justice for the oppressed, and who provide a safety net for those who fall on hard times or who are unable through no fault of their own to provide for themselves. And I am thankful for charities and churches who contribute to this same cause. In sum, thanks to all who sacrifice to make this world a better place!
Mike Cahill
11/23/2011 09:35:55 am

Sounds like you're saying the only time we should thank someone is if they made some sacrifice to do the action? Rather, I think thanks are due proportionately to what the recipient has received, that is, how large the benefit is.

Ken Daniels link
11/23/2011 11:26:29 am

Point well taken. Sure, we can be thankful for benefits we receive from others that require no sacrifice, but more honor is due to those who give sacrificially than to those who give without personal cost. From Luke 21:

1 As Jesus looked up, he saw the rich putting their gifts into the temple treasury. 2 He also saw a poor widow put in two very small copper coins. 3 “Truly I tell you,” he said, “this poor widow has put in more than all the others. 4 All these people gave their gifts out of their wealth; but she out of her poverty put in all she had to live on.”

Anthony
11/26/2011 09:59:22 am

Hello Ken,

I have recenlty gone through a deconversion experience back in April/May 2011. I was raised Catholic but most of my life I was in "Evangelical" circles. I enjoyed your book and I wrote an essay and included some of you thoughts. They corresponded with mine. I must say, I'm not an Atheist at this point, but I'm definately not an Evangelical Christian either. I will be reading your book again .. Sincerely,, Anthony

Respectful Atheist link
11/26/2011 06:23:41 pm

Hi Ken,

You may not remember me, but I e-mailed you a couple of years ago (under the moniker "Anonymous from Canada").

Anyway, sadly, I am still living as an "in the closet" atheist, but my wife (to my complete shock) has since told me that she no longer believes also (so I guess we're "in the closet" together).

I started blogging, a few months ago, and I wrote about your book here,

http://respectfulatheist.blogspot.com/2011/09/unanswered-prayers.html

It's great to see that you're blogging, as well, and I look forward to following along.

Ken Daniels link
12/1/2011 09:46:25 am

Thanks for your response, Anthony. It's interesting all the different kinds of trajectories individuals take in their journey away from conservative faith. I trust you've been able to relate to friends and family without too much negative fallout. It can be stressful to know others view you as a traitor and are praying for you to change.

Thank you too for writing, Respectful Atheist. I enjoyed looking through some of your refreshing blog posts--you and I have very similar perspectives and a similar approach. It's great to know your wife is following down the same path--I can imagine how exciting it was for you to find out. If you have to remain in the closet, I'm sure it's a whole lot less lonely to be there together!

Ken

Andrew
12/4/2011 12:30:05 am

I was really excited to see that you have started a blog. I look forward to reading it and being able to interact with some fellow de-converts!

This will be my first Christmas as a true non-believer. Trying to figure out how I want to view it has been something I've been thinking a lot about lately. Although Thanksgiving is less directly religious, it does seem almost impossible to ignore it this time of year. You did a nice job of bringing it back to its secular roots. We all have plenty to be thankful for, religious or not.

Now if we could just figure out how to handle Christmas... I know it started as a secular seasonal celebration, but the Christians pretty much have it locked down. It almost feels disrespectful to all those who so strongly believe for me to pretend to celebrate the birth of Jesus. I guess I will be focusing more on the holiday "spirit" than on the literal meaning of the holiday itself. I'm sure there will be some blog posts about this in the coming weeks...

Ken Daniels link
12/5/2011 12:31:19 pm

Hi Andrew,

Thanks for your feedback! Yes, Christmas is a biggie for those of us who are out of the mainstream, even if Christmas has become more secularized over the years. I'll plan to offer my thoughts on it in my next blog post; thanks for the suggestion!

Ken


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    Author

    Kenneth W. Daniels (1968-), son of evangelical missionaries, is the author of Why I Believed: Reflections of a Former Missionary. He grew up in Africa and returned as an adult to serve with Wycliffe Bible Translators in Niger on the edge of the Sahara Desert. While studying the Bible on the mission field, he came to doubt the message he had traveled across the world to bring to a nomadic camel-herding ethnic group. Though he lost his faith and as a result left Africa in 2000, he remains part of a conservative Christian family. He currently resides with his wife and three children in suburban Dallas, TX, where he works as a software developer.

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